tired & expired

your dark-skinned lover

i had never bought you a bunch
of yellow chrysanthemums
or even a single white rose
never cared to go home
on the 40th day
or dared to visit your tombstone.
it would only remind me
of how cold you were
when you were in existence
that is somehow limited to
sitting on the front porch,
drinking a glass of gin
and smoking your favorite
cheap brand of cigarette.

in the mid of april,
i wanted so much to tell
you how i despise your
brown-eyed lover
but you were too fascinated
with adorning her
and your love-child with
all their fancy wants
and created needs.
it was sickening,
especially the idea that
as she was sucking out
all your wealth,
and we struggling
to live on nothing,
you and her branded us
as blacksheeps.

and yet i spent every single
cent and tears to get you
off the disease she had caused you.
i swallowed insults and curses
served coldly in an expensive platter
just to make sure you’d be well.
still, i wonder why you let them
tell lies and insult me even more.
i could’ve forgiven her and you
but i waited for the “thank you”
or “i’m sorry” that never came.

you loved her so blindly
and i, so much less.

Posted 1 year ago — 1 note